I recently read an article on the four types of moms you see at Target. Every one of them had little kids.
Really? How about the older moms who lie awake at night and pray for their wayward adult children? The moms who have ached and agonized when their beloved children have suffered the hell of divorce, or illness, or whatever else life hurls at them as grownups. What about the moms who have poured out their lives for their families and are having a hard time adjusting to a newly empty nest? The moms who grieve because their kids are caught in addiction and they can’t fix it for them. The mom whose kid is in jail? We are all still moms! In fact, we are black-belt moms. We are moms with decades of courage, building strong, flexible mothering muscles. We have calluses on our knees from praying for our precious kids. And guess what? We still love being moms! We love our big, grown-up children just as much as we did when they were small enough to ride in our shopping carts. only now we get to enjoy them as peers, too.
Oh, how I love young mothers! I am such a fan of good mothering I can hardly stand it. On many occasions, I have whispered to a stranger in public, “Good job, Mom” when her child is pitching a fit and she doesn’t back down and give in. It thrills my heart when I see a loving mom (or dad) ignore the embarrassment of a child’s public misbehavior to take the opportunity to build their character. My heart is always to encourage and love on younger mothers. But girls! Don’t be so shortsighted as to believe you will only be a mom until your little one is a big one.
I have a beautiful daughter I look square in the eye, and two handsome sons I have to reach up to hug. They are the light of my life and they always will be. I would lay down my life for them without a second thought. I hurt when they hurt and I rejoice with their every victory. I am so proud of them I could burst, and my gratitude for them knows no bounds. I like them. I enjoy them.
I may not wipe their noses anymore, but there are still times I have the privilege of drying a few tears.
We are ALL moms. Enjoy the little-kid years, sweet girls, but don’t kid yourself into thinking motherhood gets easier. It changes, it gets different, but it is never ‘easy’. The main thing that changes as the years go by is you. You will get stronger, and love even more. Motherhood is a precious gift for those of us who are profoundly blessed with that privilege. I do not take that gift lightly. Don’t you either, okay?
If you are worn out to the back teeth and need prayer or a hug or a few minutes alone, ask an older mom for help. It is our privilege to help you; in fact, it’s one of the reasons we are here. We get it! Our hair may be grayer and our bodies softer, but we are still moms and we understand your struggle better than you know. If your own mom is, for whatever reason, unable or unwilling to be that ‘mom’ you need, by all means find yourself a second mom.
PS: You are doing a great job!